Beauty and Madness

Today, I woke up thinking about love and all the beauty that comes with it.

I once fell in love with someone who seemed to be made for me--someone who really got me. He didn't even try; it was so effortless. People around us would say that we slipped into our own little bubble whenever we were together. It was as if we were synced, like we were in the same wavelength. That didn't mean we didn't have differences. In fact, we enjoyed bantering and arguing with each other. 

But even then, with all the beauty and the madness, I just knew we weren't going to end up together.

In an alternate reality, he would've been perfect for me. We would've been perfect for each other. People write songs and poems and novels about something so rare. People search the world for it, and we had it. We still do. We still hang out once in a while and every time, there's still that "automatic" connection. We just get each other. We would've been perfect for each other, but the choices that we make lead us to where we're going, and our choices led us to this version of reality.

Not too long ago, I've learned that love is not enough. It's not enough for him to love you. He also has to choose you, and he has to choose you every day for the rest of your lives. Holding out for someone who is emotionally unavailable is almost always tragic. It is almost always destructive.

Having someone who effortlessly understands you may be beautiful, but I'd rather love someone who chooses to understand me and will make that choice every day, even when it's hard.