Polaris

For we dream our own dreams, after all. 

You and I--we're lunging, chasing, reaching for our own Polaris.

Listen.

Absolution

To not be okay
To not know the answers
To be afraid
To fail
To fall down
   and stay there for a time
   to seek for reasons
To stand up
   with knees heavily shaking
To look up with hazy eyes
   and not brush away the flowing tears
To believe in the unbelievable
To dream the impossible.

Maybe it's okay
Once in a distant while
Maybe it's okay.

JEI 04.28.13                    

Sunday Lessons: We need not fear losing things that seem irreplaceable.

If God asks for something, trust that He will give it back, or that He will give us something much, much better.

Trust Him to provide for you. Remember that God can do anything. Trust that He will give you what you need. 

Let go. Let go of what He tells you to. Let go of what's not meant for you. Let go of this world, and rejoice at the thought of heaven.

Rejoice at the thought of what awaits you there.

"For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." 

                                                       - Luke 12:34

Dream Sequence no. 2

I'm posting this only because it was too vivid a dream, that I can still remember most of it upon waking up.  I just had to write it down. Dream sequence no. 1, on the other hand, eludes me, though I do remember that it had something to do with Obama and a party in a yacht. :P

He was one of those guys you don't really notice. The thick-rimmed glasses, the metal mouth, the awkward hobbling down the hallways rendered him invisible.

But noticed he had been. By her, no less. Perfect, golden-haired, beautiful-eyed poster girl noticed him.

And he was happy. Everything felt like a dream to him. He couldn't believe she was his.

She had this sadness in her eyes. There was no glow in her face, no spring in her step.

He couldn't understand why she felt so differently.

"You're looking good," an old friend observed.

"There's my wife and my daughter," he beamed with pride. His friend looked at him, wide-eyed and reverent.

Then the smile fell, and in a soft whisper, he confessed, "But I'm losing her."

She's home alone. She opens the familiar cupboard, and she finds it--the solution to all her problems. She drowns her sorrows away, the only way she knows how.

He sees her. She sees him looking at her. They both stare at each other for a while, until the tears finally became too heavy not to start falling.

Suncreens and Saturdays

Listen.

Sunday Lessons: Life is a marathon. What and whom are you running for?

Strip down, start running, and never look back.

We are all runners. We're all running, struggling, panting to get to the finish line. We all hunger to win the race. We want success. We want the highest positions, the biggest house, the fastest car. We always want to be the best. And there's nothing wrong with wanting and striving to be the best, but what are you striving for? Whom are you striving for?

It's easy to get caught up in ourselves. While running, we think about how thirsty we are, how tired our feet are, how soaked our shirts had become. Many times, we get off track because we choose to run our own race. We forget that this is God's race we're running. We forget that it is God who gives us the strength and the courage to keep going. That He gives us second wind.

"But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles;

they will run and not grow weary,

they will walk and not be faint."

                               - Isaiah 40:31

So run for Him. Run for His plans for you. Run and never look back, never surrender. He'll be waiting at the finish line.

And I'll leave you with one of my favorite Bible verses:

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

                                           - Phil 4:13

Two Years of Rediscovering Ethereal Wonders

Happy birthday, Drew! 

Cheers to more years of beautiful memories together. ♥

Epiphany

Right now, at this very moment, I can say that life is good. It may not be fair, and it may not be easy, but it is good, and it is worth living. :)

Photo Credits: April Lyn Rone

Sunday Lessons: Go beyond what's comfortable.

"Go from your country, your people and your father’s household to the land I will show you."

                                                          - Genesis 12:1

I'll be the first to admit that I prefer staying in my oasis--I hold on to what's familiar, to what gives me a sense of security. Because yes, it's hard. It's hard to let go of relationships, of ways of life, of worldly pleasures, of things that we think define us. It's hard to strip off everything and just put the rawest form of yourself out there for all to see.

But by choosing to stay in my self-drawn margin, I missed a lot of experiences, a lot of chances to grow. Because what is life without changes? What is life without moving forward?

"We often resist change, but really, who would want a life without it? Some of our greatest experiences, growth, and rewards come to us as the result of moving to a new place, switching jobs, following a different course of study, or moving into a better relationship."

                                                                    - Nick Vujicic, "Life Without Limits"

Years ago, I swore I would never dare to go ziplining. It's not worth the risk, I said. I don't know what changed, but I ended up trying it anyway. And boy was it amazing. I could see, feel, breathe God's magnificence all around me. It was so magical; it was so surreal. And had I not tried, had I not dared to step outside my comfort zone, I never would have known.

Maybe it doesn't have to be gigantic. Maybe we just have to take small steps, and eventually those small steps will take us to the farthest places, give us our greatest experiences, and allow us to conquer this big, big world.

"And behold, I am with you until the end of age."

                                                      - Matthew 28:20

From Seoul with love. ♥

I especially love the sneaker phone accessory. Too bad it can't be attached anywhere on my phone. :(

Thank you mother and sister! :D

Desperate for changing.

She tries on a pretty dress, and crowns her head with the shiny red headband she bought that afternoon. Slowly, agonizingly, she forces her lips into a smile. Yet the tears pool. And they fall. They keep falling.

Oh little girl, anybody who would look into those big brown eyes right now will see how broken you are.

Sunday Lessons: Never think that God's delays are denials.

"Waiting is part of the process of becoming what God wants us to be."

                                                                            -John Ortberg

We all had those moments. Moments like standing in line at a fastfood restaurant for so long that you swear you can hear your tummy crying, and then finally, finally, you're there. The joy of that first bite, of that first sip... It's heaven.

I have had my fair share of waiting. Well, to be honest, there are some things I've been praying for for a while now, and I'm still waiting. Yes, it can be tiring at times. It's easy to get frustrated, to be disappointed. It's so easy to ask, "Lord, can You even hear me?"

But you see, waiting is beautiful thing, because it is while waiting that our faith is tested. We prayed and the answer has not come. Will we trust Him, or will we take matters into our own hands? Are we going to ask God, or are we going to try and find the answers our way? 

"Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord."

                                                                  - Psalm 27:14

I believe in waiting, and I believe that God always knows when to give, when not to give, and when to take away. I believe that anything worth having is worth waiting for. :)

Author's Note: So this is the first of my Sunday Lessons. Sunday Lessons will be short reflections from the messages I get to listen to in church. Now you know why I love Sundays so much. :)

Poetry in Motion

Sometimes you come across something you have no idea of. And like a beacon in the dark, it's calling for you. It lures you. You decide to take a look at a peephole, and what you see ends up blowing you away.

I just finished watching the last episode of "That Winter, The Wind Blows", and I'm still in that "what-am-I-going-to-do-with-my-life-now" stage. The withdrawal symptoms are setting in.

"If it's over between us, stay well. If it's not over, let's see each other some time. I want to tell you what I couldn't tell you. Starting with what I thought when we first met. When I fell in love with you. How beautiful you were." - Oh Soo

If I could summarize this series in one word, it would be this: beautiful. Starting from the obvious--the lead couple, down to the acting, to the script, to the soundtrack, and of course, the cinematography. Yes, the cinematography is just...awesome. The focus, the framing, the colors...couldn't be any more perfect, couldn't be any more beautiful. I haven't watched too many Korean series, but I think it's safe to say that this series has set the bar high.

And I won't even attempt to retell the story. Reading about it instead of watching it is defilement. You have to experience the magic of every frame, of every scene, of every tear falling from Oh Soo's eyes. I tell you, it's magical.

So that's it. No more hours to count. No more sleepless Thursdays. When you come across something so great, something that blows you away, it becomes a part of you, and when it's gone, you feel that emptiness--an emptiness that can't be filled by anything less wonderful. I have a feeling there will be countless "That Winter, The Wind Blows" marathons in my future.

PS: I'll look for better screencaps later. For now, I badly need some sleep.
PPS: Still not HD, but I think they're better. The downloading is taking forever.

Little Snapshots of Heaven

There are days when I look up to the sky and wonder when and how it all changed--when everything became so beautiful, so breathtaking. The birds flying by, the occasional plane traveling across the starry sky, the way the sunlight strikes a certain flower... Like many of the important changes in my life, I don't know exactly when it happened. And I have come to find that I don't really mind not knowing.

I wish everyone gets to feel this joy I'm feeling. At random times in random places, I get awestruck by the masterpieces created by my amazing God, and it fills my heart with so much bliss, so much gratitude. The world is a beautiful place. :)